Yes, I'm a pastor's wife, but I suspect not all of my readers are Christian. I won't hold back on my beliefs, but I also won't shove religion at you. I try not to accept things just because they're told to me but read and research in order to make up my own mind. You'll find a random mix of stuff here, depending on what interests me at the moment. I like to read others' opinions, whether they agree with me or not, which means I love comments on my posts!

Wednesday, October 2, 2013

Girls' Club: Insecurities

I lead Girls’ Club once per month at church for young women ages 12 and up. Last week, we wrapped up our lesson on insecurity. Know what I learned? We deal with a bunch of junk!

I think it’s safe to say every woman (and likely every man) deals with some kind of insecurity, and it can show in very destructive ways. We loosely followed Beth Moore’s So Long Insecurity study (book and workbook), changing our flow as needed to accommodate the girls and what they’re currently experiencing. The study itself was ok, but maybe not Beth Moore’s best. Insecurity is a very touchy subject, and it was too easy to leave the girls more down and insecure than they were to begin with.
Beth Moore had some really good points though. I won’t get in to it here, but the section on pride stemming from insecurity hit me hard.
Look inside the book at Amazon.
 
While looking for the link to the book, I came across So Long Insecurity, Teen Edition. That would've been nice to notice before I started this lesson.
Anyways, in this last meeting with the girls, we reviewed some of the main points. I had a couple of large papers tacked to the wall to write our lists on, which thankfully encouraged participation. Sometimes (rarely) these girls get quiet and don’t respond during the lessons.
What are we insecure about?
Looks
Popularity/whether people like us
Abilities (athletic, book smarts, talents, etc.)
Our value or worth/if we’re valuable
Our future
If we can trust people

Where does it come from? What are some roots of insecurity?
A past failure
A time we were embarrassed
People we love putting us down or insulting us
Not having our basic needs met at home or not feeling loved by family
Society/media that pushes the “perfect” image

What do insecurities make us do? How do we react?
Cry or get depressed
Grouchy, have a bad attitude
Ready to fight
Manipulative/controlling
Worry
Envy
Not start or finish something because of a fear of failure

How can we fight insecurities?
Pray
Read Bible
Memorize a relevant verse to quote when insecurities arise
Face them – don’t hide from what makes us insecure
Avoid – know our triggers and avoid them (like not flipping through magazines in the checkout line if looks is an issue)
Exercise/Laugh – get those good endorphins going
Serve others – insecurity is a form of selfishness because we’re consumed only with ourselves. Serving helps us to think about others, getting our minds off of ourselves and our problems
Refuse to accept it, get stubborn
React differently – we can’t always change our emotions, but we can change our actions and add better thoughts. Our emotions will eventually follow our actions and thoughts.
Why battle the insecurities?
Ephesians 6:12 “We wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world.”  Insecurity is one of the devil’s weapons. We’re not fighting against flesh and blood, but it is most definitely a war! We can choose to give in and give up to the devil or we can refuse to accept it, to fight our insecurities so that we can do the work God has planned for us. We may always be insecure about something, but we can choose to not let them control us or stop us from our intended purposes!
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